it really doesn't help a boy with a penchant for clothing capers much to be practically living inside a mall: the trials of fortitude and dedication are nearly endless.

take this afternoon for example. it was just a quick run to robinsons place for a cash withdrawal (atms and monthly stipends don't help much either) when i happened to take a peek at the oxygen boutique, and happened to chance upon another exquisite jacket, this time in flesh with brick-red accents. now, i don't want to be labelled as a brand loyalist, but oxygen is really the only store i've seen which consistently comes close to my taste in jackets, and with my current obsession with them, you can just imagine the endorphin spike that was for me.

now, i had just bought a jacket (remember moss green with blue) from the said store, which was a great find as well. but now, even i find it especially extravagant to be purchasing yet another one so soon after the previous one, so i was pretty set to walk away. i thought i could easily resist temptation, until my eyes wandered across the clincher: 20% off on all items, in big blaring bold red signs scattered throughout the shop. even during all-mall sales, you'd be hard-pressed to find something better than 10% off, aside from dumpworthy items the stores have to get rid of. 20% is a regular miracle of everyday life, if you ask me. which is precisely why the real test began.

my breathing and pulse rate quickened; my palms and brows broke out in a cold sweat. one could have seen the wild, manic twinkle that lit up in my eyes at that moment. the retail beast had awoken; next came the epic struggle between its insatiable hunger for good buys and my remaining values and restraints. i swear, i could have gone all epileptic in rob, with that intense internal conflict going on in my head. fashion or frugality? style or sensibility? trendsetting or thriftiness? the alliterations could keep on coming, but you get what i mean. while my brain was desperately trying to weigh my options, my hands and feet must have had minds of their own, with the repeated pacing to and from the store and the constant reaching for my wallet, even if i already knew i had enough money if i wished to give in. funny how some actions can become almost reflexive once you've done them all too often.

but guess what? i didn't cave this time. as hard as it was for me, i turned my back to the incredibly-amazing-flesh-with-brick-red-accents jacket and paced away as fast as i could that wouldn't look weirdly autistic inside a mall. but before anyone praises the strength of my character, let me just cut you off right here. the only reasons i held off the overwhelming drive to spend were because i already had eyes on a pair of sneakers i had spotted last week, and what i'm really looking for is a jacket in the perfect shade of blue. twisted motives, yes, but they work just fine.

so just watch out, the retail beast will crave for sacrifice soon enough.